i want something to make me belive in life, but as i see it the worlds already ending, i have lost all hope and faith in humans and thier cruel ways, what is left to be hopeful for? i want to feel it, i do, but i feel im tugging on a line that is just there to be pulled on and not pulled back. I want to runaway, be hidden for all eternity. This world has gone ahead of what im prepared for, maybe its best to say the words i have been dying to say. Maybe im just one of those people made for a sad ending. Im so tired of this i just wanting to be something, anything than the person that i am. I want to be accepted, not critisized, my whole life i have always felt like i have to live up something. IT makes me so sad, it hurts, OMG it hurts. I see to many awful qualities in me and dont see any good.

I want to feel beautiful and just right, that there is nothing wrong with who am. What is wrong with me? Why i cant i just be rid of this depression, what is making me so sad, why cant i just be happy, what happend to me to make so.so.unhappy with life. When can i just be enough, when can i just be something worth living life. There is always going to be something out there that is better than me. Posted by razzmatazz at 4:01 PM 3 comments Friday, February 11, 2005 Since when was pure and honest love a crime. But im infatuated with you, and i dont think that its bad, but think what you like. Of course i want more than that, i breathe for it, i must be crazy to say these things.

Im proud of helping you, you are my only desire, why is that so bad? Why is it so bad that i cant live with out you, that doesnt mean you need to be mine forever, i cant cage you, but at least be my friend through it all. I have never felt pain like this when you say things like that, i love you soo much, i do make myself happy, but i also make myself happy making you happy.

You own my heart i say, but thats not enough, you own everything i say, but thats not enough, i let you feel my heart scream for acceptance, not enough, i see you and i see life, beautiful life, i look into your eyes and i see a captivating future, i look at your face and body, i see a past that brings a smile to my face, i look into your soul and see the man that was made to be perfect for me, but then i hear those words and i.i. Im not enough? You havent made up your mind, i dont want to be that.

Eternal sunshine of a spotless mind